Death and Life are in the Power of the Tongue (Mishlei 18:27)
Our words can build up, strengthen and encourage others – life – or they can tear down, weaken and dishearten others – death. Speech is one of the major concerns discussed in Jewish teaching about ethical conduct (musar). Jewish law forbids the use of derogatory remarks or deprecating language. In Biblical times such violations were met with lashings and/or stoning.
In his book “Taming of the Tongue”, Mark Kinzer gleans insights from the Chofetz Chaim and other traditional Jewish sources to address the subject of proper speech. His involvement with Messianic Judaism caused him to reflect on how traditional Jewish teachings fit and complement similar teachings found in the Brit Hadashah.
The author explores his teaching on the “tongue” by dividing the book into two parts: examining how our tongue can bring death to others, while the remainder of the book shows how our tongue can bring life to others. We are aware of how slander and gossip can have a profound impact on our personal relationships as well as our witness for HaShem, but I think few of us realize the part that negative humor plays in destroying relationships. Today’s society has lost the ability of how to show true expressions of friendship thus resorting to negative humor as a means ” to build” relationships. In time this will lead to jealousy, resentment and criticism resulting in inhibiting, rather than building a relationship.
Kinzer devotes the remaining chapters of his book as to how our speech can give life and hope to others. He notes that to use our tongue to “build up” others, we must first learn to gain control over it. We must “bridle” our tongue, then ensure that our speech is seasoned with genuine love, courtesy, peace making, and when necessary, correcting with meekness.
Our aim in learning how to harness our tongue is so we will love G-D with our whole heart, soul and mind, communicate His love and build souls for His Kingdom. Now let us go and use this “gift” of the tongue with the respect it deserves and devote it wholly to the service of HaShem.